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4.09.2013

Today I Have a Sense of- Budding Life

Oh what goodness! What unfathomable goodness surrounds my every moment of each passing day. What am I, that the Lord of all should follow all my days with goodness and mercy? What wretchedness lies within this breast of mine. Yet His affection is all mine through the pierced hands of the Lamb.

It becomes clear. I gain a glimpse.
Oh how different this woe appears now than at my first sight upon it. The voicing of each sigh, and those tears so painfully shed are for the moment removed. Joy leaps within my soul. What a gift! Agony and blessing working in harmony as a happy instrument, accomplishing the purpose of good. Showering me with love. Presenting me with mercy.

With gratitude and praise, I lift my hands. The aching delight of seeing Him peel back each thick layer of scales. It hurts. But I now see the refreshment brought forth from the death left behind. I feel it, sanctifying me, changing me. The death and mortification, introducing newness of life.
His touch. Those pierced hands, are placed upon my very soul. Incredibly powerful, this small agonizing gesture of grace enfolds me. A sorrowing expression of love, gifted by a man of sorrows. 
What an offering. What an oblation. 

  
Yet the death stripped away still lingers. I catch sight of its presence lying about me. 
Then I feel those same blessed hands that were pierced for my reclamation, guide my attention elsewhere. 

Adjusting my focus, I look closely. There. The sowing, the toil, the suffering, had given rise to buds. Buds of life, life that He longs to witness forming within me. 

I feel His pleasure.

A smile spreads across my face. 

Rapidly, tears of gratitude stream down my face. I close my eyes, resting in His promises. Knowing, nothing can separate me from His goodness and mercy. I can't avoid them. They will never leave me. 

Glancing once more at the new buds of life so graciously given, I sigh, overwhelmed.
The overwhelming sense, the sigh. No longer of fear and anxiety but of trust and content.
My soul becomes quiet.

Yes! Lord it is lovely. I thank you... with all my heart.


"God brought me through many difficulties, tried me through various disappointments, at length carried it to the utmost point of hopelessness and it may way for some things which Providence saw needful for me... reflecting on my troubles, I clearly saw the need of them with a deal of convincing prayer, and my soul was made to see God's love in them all, and from my heart I was made to say, he had done all things well."
-Thomas Boston 




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